72-70 Having a break

77 miles on the bike
4.8 run

Thanks Lins for your wholesome support!
  I am heading outta town for a wedding. I'll squeeze in a run and ride on a boneshaker but mostly I'll be sat in a car or a plane or a train or at a dining table. Hopefully I'll eat celery, carrot and wholesome good things that are low in saturated fat. However, what is more likely, is that I'll see a bit of this: 

full Scottish

and  quite possibly some:

full English

Devonshire cream tea

and even some:

76 -73 Stepping Up.

Thanks Jo for your support!

According to my basic maths training, if you have 73 doughnuts and some nice boxes that can each hold 7 doughnuts, how many nice boxes can you fill with those doughnuts? Well, 10 remainder 3. So that is 10 full boxes with three doughnuts left over, which are best eaten quickly. That is, remarkably how many weeks there are until Ride100. This means that most participants will now have undertaken the training regime advised by the organisers of said ride. 

http://www.prudentialridelondon.co.uk/Prudential_RideLondon___Events/Prudential_RideLondon-Surrey_100/Prudential_RideLondon-Surrey_100___Training/Prudential_RideLondon-Surrey_100___Training_Plans.htm  


Consequently, I have stepped up the training this week on the shiny bike.
I am also keeping a keen eye on what I eat. Here are some typical foods I get through in a week:

Rice not maggots

79 - 77 New Bike

With the increased training coming up, the limitations of my 'other bike' were becoming too much avoid. The bike, bless its cotton socks, was an Evans own brand Pinnacle and had completed some huge rides up some big old hills - see the Geneva-Monte Carlo and Pyrenean Mountain Slog. I had been through one set of gears and now the replacement 'drivetrain' was slipping and jumping; the back wheel was making an unhealthy grinding noise, the saddle and seat post were no longer attached to the bike and relied upon gravity to stay put, and the cables were getting worn. The tyres were fat and the frame heavy and so, all things considered, I opted for an Evans deal where I could trade in said bike - it would go to a charity once fixed up - on a new one - in my case a rather nifty Jamis Coda Comp:

This is a 'hybrid', its uprightness and flat bars being suited for urban while use also possessing low gears for the sharp hills in the country. It is also nice and shiny. I have managed back-to-back Swains Lanes on it already:

This wee spin was in lieu of me not getting down to Box Hill as I wanted to get used to the Jamis.

The week's total is 47 on the bike.
I have also clocked in at 13st 13.5lbs. Therewill be a 5 mile run later. 

86 - 80. Le Dash

The blow by blow account of the training run in Northern France is now ready to read. Dan Brown move over!

Yes, there is a place called Humbert!

After last weekend off, we will return to light training again. If the darned weather can make up its mind - in a week where it snowed in Devon, a region not renowned for its ski resorts - we will 'do a Box Hill' on Saturday. 

89 88 87 Recovery

Le Dash has sunk back into the horizon like a setting sun. Life goes on - but without the use of my legs for a day. I just put my feet up and drank a pot or two of tea on the Bank Holiday. I ate lots and lots of goodies in France on the basis that I would burn it all off and more on the bike. The huge deficit took a while to reveal itself in terms of weight but today I managed to drop below 14 stone.
Plans have been firmed up for the summer slog across France. We will leave Caen - or more accurately its port of Ouisterham, a few miles north - on Saturday 20th July, having taken the ferry from Portsmouth the previous afternoon. After cutting across Mid France - NW to SE - we will arrive in Marseilles for an evening flight on 28th July  - nine days full cycling and approx 620 miles. Some of this may be done in a train if time is tight.

97-90 Le Dashed

Last week was taken up with Le Dash - the quick visit to northern France. I will knock out a blow by blow account of the shenanigans that we three shenaniganned. Keeps your eyes peeled on the right for the new blog.

Mileage last week
155
no run.

98 The Hills are Alive

Psycholists love stats - hence the Strava app that I have mentioned before. Apart from the usual facts and figures that the normal person would understand - previous experience of driving a car with its speedometer will mean most people are familiar with distance travelled over a period of time, for example - there are the other stats that ordinary people do  not grasp. Calorific intake and fat acreage are two that seem to pass a lot of people by, for example. The Strava calculates your energy output - burnt calories but also calculates the highly useful  average wattage you are putting out. It may be the case that if you were able to strap a family sized fridge-freezer combo to your bicycle you'd be happy to find out that you could keep your isotonic pop 'well chilled' as you tootled along.
A big thanks to Candy for her contribution.
As N and D and a lorra other cyclists gathered in a Dorking car park, apps at the ready, I set off up Lisson Grove towards Luton, my own app sucking in the GPS info. Despite the pressure of keeping up with the compadres down South I had time to snap a picture of another of Barnet's hidden treasures:

By ten, both the Chilterns and the Surrey Hills were buzzing with the sound of chain on sprocket. People literally flew past me on their lighter-than-air carbon fibre bikes. Just to be different, I weighed myself down with ballast - cycle locks, maps, tools, extra clothing etc, and general excess baggage. It was a nippy day with cold winds coming from many directions and by the time I got to Tring, having cut across from Kimpton, I'd had enough of hills and so sped to Chesham via a town recently built in honour of the man responsible for the increased cycle sales over the last year or so:

The particular stat everyone is after in the hills is the elevation - how much you climbed up. As previously mentioned, we don't have big mountain climbs in this country, especially in Hillingdon or Sutton. On the continent, you climb several thousand feet all in one go like this

 or this:

while here, you have to do lots and lots of little ones - like this:

Boys with toys!

104-99 The Weather

N and D are off into the hills on Sunday. They start from Dorking at 07.15 hundred O'clock on a 75 miles sportive (long distance bike race for amateur psycholists). I can't be doing with such an early start so I will put in 75 from my pad. I am looking forward to glancing the perimeter fence of Luton Aeroporto before heading back south to Rickmansworth and Denham to board a train at West Ruislip. This sudden burst of activity has, of course, been inspired by the improving weather. The thin veneer of the glossy shop window sunshine is, however, only hiding a resilient chilly wind which is still whipping around. Big, grown-up men and women are still out there on their shard-like saddles in tights, booties and ballroom gloves.
Thank you Sister Rebecca for your donation. It is my plan to cycle up to her place in Buxton.
I have had easy week with just one commute to Brixton and back, though I have walked plenty of miles as a penance. With just a week to go to Le Dash, it is time to tease oneself by scouring everyweather site available - from the BBC's, where the viewers send in the weather themselves, to the lurid graphics of Accuweather or the minutae of xc-weather. Currently, there is a strong possibilty of rain with sunny spells with temperatures hovering between -17  and 35, and variable windspeeds and a chance of snow on higher low ground.

a typical BBC weather forecast

There are also the classy european sites.

sunny spells with broken swirly cloud

113 -105 Ham and Beeches

Saturday. A spotless, blue sky, no wind and everyone is on a bike. There musta bin queues at dawn outside Halfords, Evans and Argos as there was a lot of shiny new gear out the tough streets of Ham.
It had been another hasty decision for a settlement's name - more burghers with better things to do, such as lay down the basis and prerequisites for the Industrial Revolution. 
'It's a hamlet, good citizen, Richard."
"But one with no distinguishing features, good citizen, Ethelred. What are we to do?"
"I need to get back to work on my idea for a steam powered Derrick - has any one every thought of just shortening Hamlet to Ham, good citizen Richard?"


The plan, today, was to do half the route of the Ride - Sheen Gate to Box Hill via West Byfleet and Leith Hill - sixty miles or so and the tough half.
There are routines for weekly checks on bikes. It is handy if your wheels don't fall of or that the brakes work. Work your way around the bike with Allen keys and keep it all nice and tight. This is particularly necessary in the light of the state of our suburban roads. Ride 100 will be closed to traffic but there is another hazard - the roads themselves. The highways and byways were resurfaced for the Olympics but they missed a few potholes:

just this side of Walton.

If you are cycling in a group, the person at the front has the responsibility of pointing out any hazards - potholes, glass, drainage covers, snakes, landslips, five pound notes and so on.  There are a variety of gestures employed and vocal warnings such as: GLASS! Clever huh. Invariably, however, whoever is at the front is just acting as a windbreak and my notorious excess has sheltered many a cyclist from headwinds.

We were tootling along nicely and had just left London as we nipped over the M25 at Byfleet. N shouted to us to stop. It was an abrupt shout kind of shout - not the kind of shout you use it you want to hop over a hedge for a toilet stop, or stop at a pleasant cafe for a refreshing hot beverage. It was a hurried, spur of the moment kind of shout and so we stopped in a conveniently placed lay-by. Some key piece of N's bike and fallen off in the preceding 15 miles and, with that piece probably already embedded in a car tyre, another key piece of bike had worked its way loose. N was just about to abort his participation in the mission and retreat to a nearby train station when a white van pulled up in the lay-by and out jumped a bicycle mechanic. He swiftly ascertained that a key piece of N's bike had, indeed, fallen off and following a quick call to Halfords, secured a replacement part which was fitted, at no cost, after a slight backtrack over the M25 to a small retail park in Byfleet. The hero in the white van had a bike shop of his own of in Hersham, as made famous by Jimmy Pursey and Sham 69. Do drop in to WA Cycles, www.wa-limited.com. if, for some bizarre reason, you are in Hersham.
Hope we get the opportunity to pass it forward.

N took charge of just the one navigation job. He knows the roads in this neck of the woods like the back of his neck and so in no time at all we were making an unscheduled coffee stop in the delightful village of Shere, a ham-let buried deep in a leafy Surrey valley and seemingly lost in time as they still trade in LSD (pounds shillings and pence). Well they don't really, but they could have done.

Having retraced our tracks back up the extremely steep hill we had flown down in error, we rose up to Ranham Common with its view over the vast plain south extending from the North Ridge to the South Ridge with its views of the vast plain to the north extending back up to the North Ridge. We reached Boxhill and enjoyed splendid carrot cake and coffee. 

I generally ride back to East Ewell, the Outer Limit of the Oystercard Empire, and return on a cheap train through places such as Carshalton Beeches. The burghers of this little place obviously had a bit more to go on.

96 miles on bike
5 miles run

113, 112, Safely does it.

Not two weeks ago, RP was being mercilessly swept by a wind so cold that the Polar bears of London Zoo had Ugg booties on. Today, there was the odour of cheap, hurriedly bought sun tan lotion hovering on the breeze. The winter wide-ness of the Outer Ring Road wilderness has been summarily replaced by bumper to bumper parking and frequent double-parkers. From between the tightly packed cars, like an eighties computer game, dopey pedestrians would unexpectedly pop out - often pram first - into the oncoming pelotons of cyclists and taxis. At the pedestrian crossings - controlled by lights, the sun-baked would drift across while cyclists hurtled through their midsts while the light was still red or amber. All in all the hazards of the cold and wet and poor light have been replaced by those of a congested theme park. 

Behind you!

So keep your wits about you.


Richmond Park is grassy area of rural south western London, famous for its deer and Fenton the wonderdog. It has a seven mile peripherique that, at the weekends, is jam packed with proper pelotons. The ones in the Regent's Park are never more the five or six but in the much bigger RP they contain over twenty psycholists. I joined N and D at Sheen Gate on Saturday morning and took in two laps. While they disappeared into the distance on their very nice and fast Focus bikes, I was constantly being passed by the chattering, grunting pelotons of the London Dynamo team. Cycling teams  such as London Dynamo are comprised of the kind of cyclists who do Ride100 style rides before lunch as a warm up. They have thighs that look like jodhpurs or as if they have been photo-shopped or are what you see in the crazy mirrors on a seaside pier. They have to wear specially made trousis and sit in specially adapted furniture. 

joking...?

Ride100 is a closed event meaning that the route will be shut to traffic. But the hazard of cars is replaced by the dangers of a peloton of potentially thousands of cyclists.

The week: 83 miles on the bike
0 run
0 football

119, 118, 117, 116, 115, 114. Le Dash

This week, in spite of imminent nuclear war in the Far East, Thatcher, and the persistent bad weather, Le Dash has been finalised. D, N and I have decided to ditch the tents and, in their stead, share a bed in a rather pleasant looking hotel in Montreuil Sur Mer, a name, if I haven't mentioned before, that incorporates a broad interpretation of the word 'Sur', given the 'Mer' in question requires a brisk 10 mile walk. We will visit playground of Paris, Le Touquet, for an enjoyable luncheon of marine wildlife before heading inland to Montreuil Sur Mer. 
The Sunday, will be spent, in part, in search for anything open other than Macdonald's. France is extraordinarily stubborn about its Sunday Closing Hours, so beware and stock up with rations the day before, if you fancy a similar jaunt yourselves. But, if this doesn't grab you, how about something off road:

121, 120. Fryin' Barnet

My cycling buddies live in remote areas of London - Balham and Sheen. These sleepy hamlets are both well placed for the Surrey Hills, where Ride 100 will get down to its hilly business but they are also well south of the river and so, while D and N swan off to Box Hill with their bikes stashed in the boots of their motor cars, unless I get up before I go to bed I have to leave them to it. Instead, I head north, often to the delights of Friern and High Barnet. On my reckless route, I take in the previously mentioned Regent's Park before heading to Swain's Lane and Highgate. Some local burghers, many hundreds of years ago, stood scratching their heads as they tried to decide what name to give to their recently built settlement. Looking about them there was little to choose from apart from an inexplicably and abnormally high gate. It was late, everyone wanted to get home and so they went with High Gate. 
From there, head over to Muswell Hill then beyond to the vast, endless undulations of North London before reaching the outer limits of this city - the M25 near Potter's Bar.  En route there us much to see: a classic Odeon Cinema in Barnet,  robust the Deco-ish 30's mansion blocks about Golder's Green, Friern Barnet's classic town hall.

This particular leg-stretcher clocks up 30 miles, returning through Finchley and West Hampstead before having to stop at the world's most famous pedestrian crossing to wait as Beatles fans lark about outside Abbey Road studios which was recently sold by EMI  and has since been converted into a Kwik Fit franchise. 

60 miles on bike
5 mile 'run'
1 soccerball match: 48 mins running around; 12 mins shotstopper.

124, 123,122

It is another week of bitter winds and icicles on my handlebars. The Regent's Park, despite a nasty northerly down the back straight hurling snow that stung like grit, was, however, host to hardy runners and peddlers, grinning and bearing it. The Brahs monkeys, sadly, had dropped from the trees, their icy brittle limbs no longer able to hang on. They have cut back the unruly, unkempt hedges surrounding TRP and one can now glimpse the lake, scene, many years ago, of The Who miming 'The Kids Are Alright' very badly.

Le Dash has been hastily organised: late train to Newhaven; overnight ferry to Dieppe; 65 miles on, camp in a rather nice town encrusted on a hill, Montreuil sur Mer; then cut across the Pas de Calais for an early evening ferry back to Dover - 120 miles or so of easy going country.

I have got by mass of body down to 14st 8 lbs. I no longer need certain elements of my significant wardrobe. I was able to sell a selection of my casual trousis - see below - on ebay to a provincial cricket club who were short of covers for their wickets. 

127, 126, 125 ; The Regent's Park Training Ground

I am most fortunate to live equidistant between the two big green spaces of central Lunnon. Both HP and RP are often bursting with people indulging in all kind of meaningful, but ultimately meaningless exercise.  From dawn till dusk there are cyclists and pavement pounders obssesively kow-towing to their Stravas' statistical demands.  Hyde Park is welcoming and open armed while The Regent's Park, originally hunting ground known as Marylebone Park, for most part hides behind hedges. The latter is famous for the Zoo, where, in this kind of weather, the famous Brahs Monkeys can be seen swinging from tree to tree. RP does have at least one secret - it possesses the only road in London where one can ride infinitely and indefinitely without having to stop for pedestrian or car. The Inner Ring Road, 1km  long, has no beginning or end or lights and so is perfect for training though it is a bit dull going round and round. Going round and round on the IRR is not, however as dull - or precarious - as the even duller circuits of the 5.5km Outer Ring Road.Once you have got over the Outer Road's few sights: the Mosque, the Armed guard outside the US Ambassador's crib, the running track and the neighbouring seasonal trapeze, and the Zoo, the endless hedges get very boring. The ORR does attract many road cyclists and if one is lucky one can be swept to one side and into the gutter by a passing peloton.

Easter, despite being the coldest ever known since the earth was formed one week 6500 years ago, has been OK for cycling. I 'enjoyed' climbing Swains Lane ( London's steepest hillock) twice. I have the 1005th fastest recorded time - just in front of a fun cyclist dressed as a pumpkin and cycling a big yellow, inflatable bike. 

M&S Spring Collection

66 miles on the bike
5 miles running.